This time last year

...I was on 'vacation' and making myself miserable with the notion that I had to return to 'work' in 3 days. So I got a tattoo and quit.

"I see all this potential, and I see squandering. God damn it, an entire generation pumping gas, waiting tables—slaves with white collars. Advertising has us chasing cars and clothes, working jobs we hate so we can buy shit we don't need. We're the middle children of history, man. No purpose or place. We have no Great War. No Great Depression. Our Great War's a spiritual war . . . our Great Depression is our lives. We've all been raised on television to believe that one day we'd all be millionaires and movie gods and rock stars. But we won't. And we're slowly learning that fact. And we're very, very pissed off."
—Fight Club, 1999

The Gazelle

“Every morning in Africa, a gazelle wakes up.
It knows it must outrun the fastest lion or it will be killed.
Every morning in Africa, a lion wakes up.
It knows it must run faster than the slowest gazelle, or it will starve.
The Moral:
It doesn’t matter whether you’re a lion or gazelle - when the sun comes up, you’d better be running!”

Saw it first when returning rented camera gear from David's FilmVue. Sticking it here, hoping it gives you momentary pause too. because I feel like none of us are entitled to anything, unfortunately not all of us gets this point.

Somethings Need to be Said

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”

MARIANNE WILLIAMSON

Ambition & Contempt

“It was true that I didn’t have much ambition, but there ought to be a place for people without ambition, I mean a better place than the one usually reserved. How in the hell could a man enjoy being awakened at 6:30 a.m. by an alarm clock, leap out of bed, dress, force-feed, shit, piss, brush teeth and hair, and fight traffic to get to a place where essentially you made lots of money for somebody else and were asked to be grateful for the opportunity to do so?”

—Charles Bukowski, Factotum, Black Sparrow Press, 1975

"My job consists of basically masking my contempt for the assholes in charge, and, at least once a day, retiring to the men's room so I can jerk off while I fantasize about a life that doesn't so closely resemble Hell."
—American Beauty, 1999

Why Hate Mondays?

"You're young and you've got your health, why would you want to get a job."

It's annoying how people think I have amassed mass secret pockets of free time, because I don't have to 'go to work' well I don't. I honestly don't know where the time goes but, I have no more than when I toiled for The Man. I think the structured coffee breaks and lunch hour played an overseen important part in my days. Screw it.

Had a nice chat with my DJ pal Kevin, who I bribed to lunch with a Button, and who also is strongly against, jobs. laugh. Best lunch I had in ages, though I just had a sandwich. See, we agree, on a of a number of things, but solidly on the fact that the hate thrown at Mondays is totally unjustified. If you hate working so much, esp on Mondays, QUIT. Find something you hate less.


On another note - Friend told me I'm not unemployed so stop tossing the word around "with that silly grin." Apparently, the unemployed are those of employable age and situations, steadfastly looking for work but cannot find. and that, is no, grinning matter... pretty grim.

Motivation

On this yet another rainy awesome day, I cling tightly to 2 thoughts. I wish the dry season would never come. Yet I emphasize with ye who has to get to the office in this pour... Freakin' awesome pour ainn'it. smiley. I'm not exempt. I have a 'no time' drop off on Rosalino Street - note: the 'no time' is a trump card. I part, as I came to, with two motivational pieces... if indeed one is prone to being motivated by quotes.

'The notion that we must keep everlastingly active to justify our existence is not a deep one. Much of what we do has no real value - Paul Brunton'

'Idleness does not consist in doing nothing, but in doing a great deal not recognized as industry in the dogmatic formularies of the ruling class. Robert Louis Stevenson'

The Mouth of Babes

Hung out with the niece this weekend, she's still puzzled that I quit. I know it's because she's got no fun offices to storm anymore. But the fact that she continually frets about it, makes me feel oddly loved and cared for, so I happily indulge. The conversation takes variations of:

I don't understand why you keep quitting. How will you get money?
How do you get money?
From you, and mom and dad sometimes.
See you don't work and you get money, I'll just try that.
But you need lots.
No I don't.
If you get a little bit then I cant get from that... can I?
No.
See, that won't work. Get a job
I'll think about it.
Ok.
What do you like to do...

And we go through her suggestions. Nice mature car conversation.

Some truths

Two months ago, I quit my last job, after 8 months, 3 longer than I intended. Editor in Chief. Sounds impressive right? Freebies, that's all it was, lots and lots of freebie-ing, now I'm left baffled when they expect me to pay to enter events... what? why? no.

In the 2 months, I have yet to 'make my salary' but, really, I was overpaid, just like the early years at TSTT, and had to find frivolous needs to squander it away on so perhaps these lessons against conspicuous consumption could be good for my moral development, or at least spurn the beginning of one. could be. But I do miss jay walking through the malls making random purchases. I do I miss that.

wandered across this
http://www.outlish.com/famine-and-feast-the-life-of-a-freelancer/

When so wholesomely written it's hard to trivialize, no fun. While most of this stands for Joe Jane and Tranny Public, guess who has a trump card? I have a fascinating lack of interest in money. The bills somehow always pay themselves. Now, this is no advice to go quitting your job on. You have to really, really believe in fairies and the magic for it to work...

As threatened... it'll be sorted out

This blog is set to marginalize those mixed feelings of yours. Your hatred of your boss, though you, a god fearing christian or whatnot, hate not any other being as intensely.
Your unwarranted hatred of innocent Monday mornings.

That questioning in the pit of your stomach when you're sent to 'lunch' at 11:45 and demanded back in one hour when you
are neither hungry nor wish to be ordered about. the doubt that's steadily crept it, from form 6 to year one, and seemed set in Final year
with the first semester of Comm Skills when you realized, You, Ms University Graduate would have to clock in at 8 and be at it longer than the regular 8hours staff line up because, well you're a university graduate after all and people look up to you. Congrats if you did in fact choose to study something you love doing. Life's bound to be a trip.

The rest of you, and me, us, well, we go sort it out